TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
At the end of the white elephant exchange, our professor had a big black dildo around her neck and I won a full body dinosaur suit. I could die tomorrow with no regrets.
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
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