did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
Just want the two of you to know, I went to a golf tournament today. Respectable, expensive… Flipped the golf cart. Seriously, I'm 40. What the fuck?
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
I’m going to bedazzle that dick
What does that even mean
No idea, but I guarantee he’ll get hard every time he remembers it
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
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