You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
and eventually we just all took our pants off
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