She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
I realized we pick a president more often than I get a blowjob
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
Randomize
