You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
I get way too drunk to be trusted with family heirlooms
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
i think we sleep fucked last night...
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
Randomize
