why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
i wanna give whoever invented massage chairs a blow job.
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
Met my future wife peeing in the men's room. I stood in for the missing door on the stall. We really hit it off talking about how her butt didn't even touch the seat from all the years of squat lifting in high school.
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
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