Are we in a gay sports bar?
The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
He was drunk at Denny's at 5 am saying how Dear John was the worst movie he has ever seen... eyes filled with tears.
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
if having to see my ex’s dick once in a while is the price I pay to the universe for making my life go a little smoother, I’ll take it
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