And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
My foreign exchange student got here today. I turned on man vs. food and told her that "this is all you need to know about America."
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
I deleted his number so I had to go into my old voicemails which are saved through my gmail and search his name... Never underestimate the resourcefulness of a drunk girl on a mission for dick
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
Randomize
