You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
There's a burrito next to my bed. Did you buy it for me or is the Chipotle fairy real? And why am I naked?
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
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