Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
Also I am about to cut a ringtone from "Sex Machine" so James Brown can tell me to "get up, get on up" in the morning
I once woke up to the scream from 'get up offa that thing' and smacked my head on my desk
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
trust me, there is no more disappointing feeling in the world than waking up at 4 in the morning with a random half naked chick in your bed and then realizing your roommates girlfriend just wandered into the wrong room.
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
I better get weekly incoherent text messages or I will assume something is wrong.
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
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