He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
Hey can you send me a copy of my mugshot? I need it to prove a point
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
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