soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
