Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
You need to call dibs on the blond with the tits. It's your birthday.
Haha hell yea
Because if someone gets to see those.. It should be you. It's like God telling you Happy Birthday.
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
Randomize
