My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
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