Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
Randomize
