I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
For some reason I knew you were going to smell like strippers and burritos when I hugged you.
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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