Get your hand out of your ass!
how did you know my hand was in my ass? Guess where my other hand is..?
In your belly button
Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
operation harelip BJ is a go
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
I was relieved after I found the unopened condom in my pocket. Then I found the open one in the other pocket..
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
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