id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
Randomize
