my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
Old men and throwing up are my life now.
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Randomize
