there's paper in my vomit.
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
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