You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
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