I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
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