no. you can't hotbox the world.
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
It's probably just the physical manifestation of slut karma. But i of course mean that in the kindest way possible because i love you and respect your choices
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
Come to my pity party. It's being hosted in my basement. The theme is ambiguously sexual cuddling and wine.
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
Randomize
