i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
What should've been a 10 minute beer run turned into her having a 40 minute mental breakdown in my car while in the parking lot. She then asked if she could live at my house and be my girlfriend. Her finishing act was stealing my peanut m&m's.
Well, when a girl introduces herself as "stormy" and gets your number from her boyfriends phone, I'd say that your situation is to be expected.
Randomize