I tried to give up sex for lent. It feels weird that on easter I'm this excited to be a whore again
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
She was wasted. Kept yelling "what if I'm pregnant" and trying to push me into the tree. First and last time I bring a girl to my family christmas party.
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
Randomize
