So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
I think the secretary can hear it when I fart in the bathroom, how do you think she feels about that?
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
I got inside last night via doggy door
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
I'm just drunk enough to be eating egg rolls on the toilet
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
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