We got so high we made milksteak
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
You made out with two different species that night
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
I brought an already opened bag of trail mix from home to snack on today. Some motherfucker ate all the m&ms out of it. I hate my roommates
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