I'm drunk
Is that why you're texting me
Yes
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
Sad realization: so long as I use this sleep apnea machine, I will never be the little spoon!
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
Randomize
