she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
You showed up to your dad's bday dinner late, dirty, and hungover then proceeded to yell at the bartender for trying to take advantage of you by putting extra bourbon in your drink... Highly doubt you win best daughter award.
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
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