piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
oh. my. god. the guy i hooked up with last night is currently wearing a dress.
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
4 words: hood of his car
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
So I spent all night thinking my bed was floating down a river and telling the cats to get on the bed because they were going to float away. Percocet is strong shit.
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
Randomize
