After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
Randomize
