He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
of course. lets lasso hookers.
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
It's like I'm tryna ride my horse through dennis quaid’s vineyard
That's a sexy sentence
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