If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
do herpes really smell.
Oh btw, my mom called... you made the police blotter in the newspaper. Don't worry, she's mailng me a copy so I can put in on the fridge.
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
Can I borrow you for, like, thirty minutes so you can lay on one boob and rub the other until I fall asleep?
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
Randomize
