she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
You went through my pantry and left one of everything in the box. One cracker. One cheesit. One piece of cereal. I really fucking hate you.
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
At 3:00am my whole house started smelling like cooking meat. I have no idea why she thought it was a good idea to crock-pot a WHOLE turkey that early in the morning.
Randomize
