And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
Dude. He only had one testicle. It was like his whole package was a Muppet Show character coming at me.
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
I swear to god my spidey sense only tingles when someone’s about to die or you’re being a hoe.
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
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