maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
Randomize
