i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
Randomize
