Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
Emergency! LinkedIn connected me to a hotornot hookup from sophomore year... slutty phase sphere has officially invaded grown up professional sphere. My illusions of interweb sexual anonymity have been exploded.
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
