I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
My boyfriend sold my favorite shoes right off my fucking feet last night outside the bar. It might have played a part in our breakup today.
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
Randomize
