my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
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