? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
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