You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
Naked Twister starts at high noon
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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