my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
There's times when I just want to bottle my farts for later they're so insane.
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
Correction: Jimmy johns. The one pita pit employee has been an asshole to me ever since you locked them out of the store
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
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