that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
He just gave a drunken 7 minute speech on how to make the perfect grilled cheese. he explained types of butter and cheeses....i think i love him
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
I don't remember its real name, I just call it the Harrison Ford Cush after that idea with the Indiana Jones mask. I should just get high and sell people my ideas for their Halloween costumes all the time. I'd make a fucking fortune.
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
I made people serenade her before talking to her and went on a condom run. If I'm going to be in the friend zone, I'm going to be its fucking king.
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
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