If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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