I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
Bringing my cat to a booty call was not my finest hour
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
Randomize
