what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
What part of "waking up in the crawl space of my house with a raccoon" sounds like a good night to you?
When she gives birth, I'm so playing 'Eye of the Tiger'
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
I cooked you Mac and cheese when I was drunk and drugged. That counts for about 4 meals. Try harder
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
Wearing Navy dress whites to a wedding is like having a magical panty removing device. I've never cockblocked a whole room just by existing before.
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
Randomize