I wish I could punch you in the face.
Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
Well I found out I was essentially dumped and replaced by a hipster and apparently offered a girl $95 to go out with me. In the spirit of the Olympics I will not be spending any time on the medal stand.
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
Today I found out that my boss keeps a breathalyzer on his desk for just these sort of shenanigans
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
Randomize
