i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
I just thought I should tell you that I always know what you are doing. Everywhere. Every time. -Your loving Mother
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
Randomize
