So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
It's official drugs can't kill me
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
I'm feeding a baby and swiping on tinder...what has my life come to?!?!
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