Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
I'm using toast as a chaser. If I wasn't already so fucked up this would be revolting.
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
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