yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
She's not a foreskin expert like you
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
I told her we had to stay at the bar until at least midnight because that's when my direct deposit hit, don't tell me i'm not responsible
Can we talk about how i drunkenly changed the timezone on my phone last night and just showed up to work an hour early
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
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